I'm so fucking centered right now
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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