no, he came in my armpit
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
