Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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