Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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