where am i from again
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
