SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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