idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
