I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
