Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
