angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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