He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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