if you like me you must not know who I am
i dont even know how to be here
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
