she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
