420 ftw
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
