I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
