your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
