omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I need to calm my uterus...
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
