Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Randomize
