I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
