Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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