Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
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