I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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