that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Randomize
