i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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