I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize