he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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