ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
