franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize