how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
