Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
