Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
