Who wears a wallet chain?!
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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