I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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