I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
It's just like the Real World with babies
He passed out mid-signature
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize