Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
