8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize
