But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
