i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
