so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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