It's Friday. Sex?
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
