the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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