so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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