My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
