Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
