Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
