oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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