I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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