If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Randomize
