I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
