She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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