the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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