Don't you send me to vm
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
